A Little More Caution...

I've never not liked myself as a person.  I have always been & I am a good person.  However, I haven't always been the best decision maker.  I'm not saying that from now on I will always make the right choice (I don't think anybody can say that) but in the past, I have made most of my decisions based primarily on my emotions.  It's time I started using my head.  I've been one of those people that didn't want to have any regrets about things I didn't do.  I'd rather look back & not have regrets because I didn't give it a shot.  I still want to be "that" person but with a little more caution.  

Steam cleaning lunatic?

I've always thought of myself as a better than average person (yeah...I know, maybe that sounds sorta conceited)...one that cares so deeply for others that I often neglect myself...but sometimes I look back at my life & see things that were so selfish I'm ashamed...things that make me wonder if I'm really just some psychotic crazy lunatic trying to live a false life...maybe I'm not such a good person.   I don't want to grow old, look back & have regrets so I take chances I don't always believe in.  I am a strange combination of impulsive & cautious.  Don't really remember where I was going with all this other than thinking I might be crazy.  Okay...back to steam cleaning the carpets. 

It's all gonna be okay.

I struggle every day.  For a very long time I've been trying to claw my way to okay.  It's been hard, can't say it wasn't.  But for the 1st time in a long time, I'm finally comfortable with my life.  I can finally see that light at the end of this tunnel & it's an amazing feeling. 

Silence is golden...

SILENCE CAN BE DANGEROUS… IT KILLS RELATIONSHIPS…. it leads to misunderstandings and differences…. when we don’t discuss things we end up making assumptions, and these assumptions cause more problems… Don’t let silence kill your love and don’t let it come in-between two loving hearts…. talk as much as you can…. discuss the things that need to be discussed…. don’t wait for the other person…. if something is bothering you, talk about it…. Never keep silent over about things that are troubling you, and the things you don’t want… never let go anything that is important to you….. talk, and discuss things and compromise… work together as a team, each giving and taking to make it all work… this time spent working it all out is much more important than just partying and sleeping together and never fixing what is wrong.

~Neena Gupta

Mother's Day

Laying here thinking about Mother's Days from the past.  Once my "significant other" was asked what he got me for Mother's Day.  He simply replied that I wasn't his mother & didn't see why he should get me anything, not even a few nice words to tell me happy Mother's Day.  I've been a mother for 16 years & thinking about all of them...hearing that is what stands out more than anything.  Not saying that Mother's Day is bad for me because of that one year...just that hearing that was very hurtful. 

Mother's Day is a day to appreciate all the mothers in your life.  Your own mother, your wife or girlfriend, your sisters, grandmothers, aunts, friends...any mother.  Mothering is hard work.  Let them know they are appreciated.  Let them know you care.  And try to not say anything stupid. 

Maybe I need an aspirin?

It's been almost 2 years & I still get depressed every month that passes by.   I'm okay.  I know I am.  It just sorta sucks.